Milky the Marvelous Milking Cow
Synopsis of Toy
This toy's story sounds like something that should have ended up as a segment on In Search Of with Leonard Nimoy. Not even a limitless human imagination can speculate what the executives at Kenner toys might have said at that fateful 1977 meeting, wherein they discussed one Milky the Marvelous Milking Cow.
"It's a cow, see. And you give it a bucket of water and it drinks it. And then you use your fingers to pull on the rubber udders which issues forth a substance that looks a lot like white cloudy water."
"And then what?"
"And then what? Well. You, ah, you... you put more water in the bucket and do it again. And, ah, that's pretty much it. You get to milk a fake cow. We call it Milky. And the marketing department says we should call it Milky the Marvelous Milking Cow to emphasize, you know, how amazing it is."
"Perfect! Let's MAKE IT!!"
The real story behind the making of Milky the Marvelous Milking Cow will have to remain shrouded in mystery. There’s not much in the way of documentation from Kenner, who made the toy in cooperation with General Mills as a promotional toy with a loose (and not inconsiderably milky) connection to breakfast cereal.
To get Milky to drink from its bucket of water, you simply had to “pump its tail gently” until Milky lowered its head and sucked it down dutifully. When Milky was done drinking, it would raise its head and let loose with a meek “moo,” and then the milking fun could begin! All that was left to do was place the sturdy plastic bucket directly underneath Milky’s midsection and pull gingerly on the fairly lifelike soft rubber udders. Not surprisingly, Milky would issue forth a stream of cloudy water into the bucket.
Thirsty? Well, please don’t eat these daisies. While the powdered milk substance that came out of Milky wasn’t toxic, it certainly didn’t taste particularly pleasant either.
Milky may have been an odd toy, but had a very catchy theme song that gave the ill-fated toy a long life in the memories of those children lucky enough to have seen the commercials. Sadly, this testament to the days of thinking-way-outside-the-box toy executives did not move massive numbers of units and was discontinued shortly after its debut.
There were no sequels to Milky.